Monday, October 10, 2011
I never thought you and I would become so intertwined. That my sanity, let alone my health, would rely so heavily on you on such a daily basis. You allow me to process my thoughts at my own speed without interruption. You help me to free myself from the emotions that sometimes feel like they are choking me. You have strengthened my body and my mind. You're a tricky S.O.B. with the mind games you play, but I have to admit I love it.
Unfortunately you have worn me a bit ragged, specifically my shins. The sweet, endearing feelings I have for you will never change. I will always want you. But right now my shin scream, plead and beg for me to stop. For about 10+ years they have worked so hard, and I think they need a hiatus. I'm sorry I cannot ignore their burning any longer.
So I'm incredibly saddened that we need some space.
This weekend, I thought I could squeak in a 6k race. I had hoped that I would be able to run with you, but my shins won and I resorted to being a walker. I can happily say I finished the race. I got that cute reddish pink shirt and I even made a friend during the race.
But I can't lie. I felt a bit of resentment toward all the other running ladies. It was nothing against them, and I'm sure they too have experienced this struggle, but for the first time in my life I really feel like you were doing more harm than good. It's been a lot tougher than I thought, staying away from you. But I think it's for the best.
Please don't forget me, and do not by any means, think you have won. Because I will be back. I will be back with a vengeance, strong and healthy and ready to make even more progress than I ever have.
Until next time,